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Socoder -> Off Topic -> Quitting Smoking

Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 07:51
Jayenkai
Mum's trying to quit smoking, so is in ’’Hyper-Frustration-Mode!!’’ .. Between her and my Sister being in a similarly ranty mood, the house is currently full of anger!!!

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Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 07:51
Dan
Ok. I have few suggestions, which could help, or not. Depending on the willingness to do these exercises.

Tell her that:

She is in Charge of her feelings.

Whenever she feel rage, let her feel it a bit, then she shall recognize that the rage is not helpfull at all, and to choose to switch the rage into hapiness by closing her eyes and imagining how happy she is without smoking.


Tell her to assign Good feelings with this new imagining.

Then whenever she goes to bed, she shall start imagining herself being happy without smoking., and whenever she wakes up, the first thoughts have to be the happiness without smoking ....
This thinking process shall take up to 1m:20s , without wavering into other thoughts.


Repeat every day until the rage and the desire for smoking fades into nothingness.


And for you, Jay, remember that you are in charge on how you feel, so just keep on the good mood by recognizing that their low mood is only the invitation, not a demand to feel the same.
Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 08:54
steve_ancell
When I gave up for the third and final time, nearly 18 years ago, I refrained from saying the words 'I'm giving up'. The best thing to do when people are trying to derail your mum, when they keep saying 'Go on, 'ave one!', she should simply say 'No thanks!, I don't smoke'.

It worked for me, I ain't smoked one since year 2000.

|update| -=-=- |update|
P.S. I never used patches, lozenges, or gum. I just went complete cold turkey.
Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 10:06
Jayenkai
Mum's tried a few times, but each time she's been fully stopped, some great big fucking craptastic event happens, and she's right back on.
She stopped. Her best friend died..
Stopped again, other best friend died.
Stopped again, my Brain tumour.
Stopped again, her Mum died.

... yeah, not looking forward to the outcome of this attempt, if I’m honest!!

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Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 11:09
steve_ancell
Aww!... I hope she is successful this time around.
Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 11:13
GfK
Been trying to get me mum to quit for years but she's having none of it. Even having cancer didn't stop her so I guess nothing will.

We barely visit any more - the house utterly stinks of it and you can see big clouds of smoke just hanging in the air. When we come home, us and anything we took with us stinks of it as well. I just cannot cope with it any more and I don't want myself or the kids in that environment. Yeah I've tried using that as leverage too.

It's a disgusting filthy habit and I will never understand why anybody does it.
Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 12:04
spinal
My mam is a heavy smoker, cancer hasn't stopped her either. She's tried switching to e-cigs, but doesn't like them. My Sister stopped for a while once, only lasted about 6 months.
From watching people I know quit (or not), it seems that cold turkey is the only way that works. My Grandad stopped. He made it look easy, just turned around one day and said "I've stopped smoking" and that was it.

I have to agree with Tom, Humans are one of the few animals which can change their mood simply by changing their mood. No external stimuli required. I theory, if you feel yourself getting stressed all you have to do is calm down. I know in some cases it isn't as simple as that, but usually it's supposed to be that simple.

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Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 12:13
Dabz
I smoke, but, for one, I dont smoke in the house, I go outside, come rain or shine... I'm outside. I dont smoke in the car either, it doesnt belong to me, Nissan friends and family scheme thingy, and when I hand it back, they arent stinging me for a fortune cos of smoke... The habit costs enough as it is!

Thing is, I dont smoke many a day, this is my usual intake:-

Morning@Home: 1 or 2, coffee cup amount depending
Get to work: 1
10am break:1
12.30pm break:1
4.30 before drive home:1
6pm(ish) after my dinner:1

And that's it really, I do smoke more when I go out for a drink mind.

Thing is, I like a tab, I know they'll kill me, but, I do... I just like a tab... Cannot stand that vape thing, Ive tried it, coughed my lungs up, proper retching... I've tried the patches... I was getting palpitations off them, tried gum, them little nicotine tabs you dissolve on your tongue, and of course, the spray stuff... All of them give me crippling heartburn.

I also think the smoking ban in public places was a great idea as well... I'm pretty much trained to have a ciggy outside, and rightly so... Even when I'm round a friends house and they say "Just have one in here", I still prefer to go outside. I'm one of them smokers that cannot stand a smokey atmos either.

And regarding the smell... Aye, it stinks, it does, not going to lie, but most none smokers cannot really smell it on me when I'm out, because usually the smell comes from the hands that hold the ciggie, and when your eating out, or even drinking, you naturally waft your hands about in front of peoples noses... So, when I have a tab, I'll go and wash my hands after, seems to work, because Id be mortified if I stunk of the stuff... I'm not saying it eradicates it completely, but generally, it keeps it down enough not to ruin peoples meals... And believe me, most of my mates would tell me if my tab smoke affected them, because a lot of them hate it.

Dabz

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Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 13:40
Jayenkai
Yeah Mum is an outdoors smoker, and even then only a few puffs of a cig at a time. She hasn’t been a "full" smoker for years.

Our house doesn’t really smell too bad, apart from the odd times she brings the ashtray in to wash it, and.. eeeeeuuuw, can you smell it!!

Shouldn’t be too hard, this time, but ... the air is volatile!!

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Sat, 10 Feb 2018, 14:33
steve_ancell
GfK It's a disgusting filthy habit and I will never understand why anybody does it.

Since becoming an ex-smoker I now understand why other people were moaning, it's sheer filth. Whenever anyone asks why I started in the first place I'm like "Dunno, I must have been some kind of delousional sheep".

When I was quite young I used to say smoking is crap, now after smoking and then giving up I can quite safely say that I'm now qualified to know that it is crap.