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Socoder -> Off Topic -> Ever lost a girl?

Sat, 01 Sep 2007, 03:01
Topic title pretty much says it all.
I've been crying myself to bed for almost a year now (it'll be a year by the end of November, more or less), throwing things randomly into whatever walls have been around me, trying to talk to my ex through Messenger (only to discover things aren't as they used to be), smoking excessively to the point that when I moved to a new school (about a week ago) I lost my voice because of the harsh weather up here and my inability to stop due to pure nerve wreckage, going to the doctor, taking medication etc. etc.

Things just seems to be getting worse.

Any tips?

Afr0 Games

Project Dollhouse on Github - Please fork!
Sat, 01 Sep 2007, 03:13
A whole year? Eeek, sounds like you've got it bad!

I really have no useful advice, or at least nothing you won't have heard before. Try moving on, get another girl, hang out with your mates more, yada yada...

Or. You know. Try talking to someone about it.

''Load, Next List!''
Sat, 01 Sep 2007, 05:23
Arg! I still haven't got a girl yet so I can't really give any advice lol.
If I remember correctly, your girl was quite beautiful. Damn, I reckon that it must hurt more if your girl is beautiful.

My dumb advice would be to travel. Far away. Japan maybe or the Americas. Personally I'd go for Japan. I would advise against coming to the UK though... expensive country and cold wet weather.

/no disrespect but it would have been more appropriate to have posted this on your socoder blog. Hope you feel better.

BlitzRSS script back online!
Sat, 01 Sep 2007, 08:32
I broke up with my girlfriend of 9+1 months about a month ago, and it still gets me nauseous sometimes. Some of the best advice I can give is just to get out there and get with your friends and do what you can to keep your mind busy. Just remember that you are yourself, and that you don't need her to be who you are. I know that, its often hard to remember who you are without a girlfriend after its over, but it comes back with time. Don't feel like you have to take drugs to fill the void, because you have plenty to offer yourself to fill it with. And if that's not enough, then hang out with some mates, get with a girl for a little bit, and enjoy life for the way you were meant to live it without worrying about needing a girl. Have love for yourself; even though we've never met, I know that everyone here supports you.

|edit| A friend of mine (female), had broken up with her boyfriend of a couple of years (he was older than she, went off to college), and her heart never fully left him. The guy then started treating her horribly, coercing and taking advantage of her broken heart to basically use her... It was very sad to see her because she left with the mentality that at least the contact she was getting was contact, but it ended up just hurting her more and more. Finally we convinced her to start dating someone else merely for the sake of giving her a reason in her head to not get with her ex again, because she was thoroughly against cheating. And its worked, and the guy she got with ended up being a nice guy anyway and so they've been together for a good bit now. So maybe that might work for you, just get with someone to take your mind off of it. |edit|

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Sat, 01 Sep 2007, 12:16
I'm sorry that you are feeling bad, Afr0. I don't really have any good advice, but I hope you get some better luck in the future.

If I were to suggest anything it would be to cut out your destructive habits, like smoking, and replace them with constructive habits that make you feel good and are actually good for you too. You can get into a spiralling cycle of depression if you keep doing things that are bad for you. And it's hard, but if you then find something that makes you feel happier and you keep on at it (maybe art, reading, programming, a sport, walking or hiking, or travelling), you can fight your way out of the worst of it.

All the best,

blog | work | code | more code
Mon, 03 Sep 2007, 00:40
Thanks guys! Those are some very good tips, I'll consider them wisely.

Afr0 Games

Project Dollhouse on Github - Please fork!
Fri, 26 Oct 2007, 14:53
Hey Afr0, i know my age might be deceiving, but i understand women. I may not know why you two broke up, but i can say that if you broke up with her by your own choice, and you feel this way now, it was a little impetuous. But if she broke up with you, well, i cant explain everything, but maybe that had something to do with how you treated her. But... some girls are fickle. Hey, if she is acting so much worse, maybe you should try offering to help as a FREIND. Girls like a little assertivity, but not demanding. I hope my advice does more good than the news paper advice columnist. lol

With a phat Beat.yo.
Sat, 27 Oct 2007, 15:22
yeah, i have, it sucks. Gave me a hell of an idea for a book though! Its only been a week, but im oddly over her. Thoughts of her do still pop into my head, but im surprisingly doing quite well. my best wishes go out to you. I cant say i know how you feel because i dont really think that i do! but yes, happy thoughts.

Stuff... Yeah...
Sat, 27 Oct 2007, 17:30

First it was Sciensine and now you. What ever happened to the real coders out there?

Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 02:12
power mousey

Coder is just a term or label of what we do for fun, an interest and perhaps for a job and career as well.

all of us are real people.
Although, I wonder sometimes about being
the power mousey. Part human, part Power Ranger,
and part mouseY all rolled into one.

We all have ups and downs dude.
We all have problems, situations, setbacks
but also as well triumphs, victories, joys,
and especially New Beginnings and New Adventures too.

If you have a setback or the same or similar situation
happen to you...
then you can talk with us here about it,
if you want and like.


|edit| I used to have a few girlfriends myself. What!??
Its true. Ripley's Believe It Or Not. One girl who stood out and that I was really in love was Linda Andrejko.
We were boyfirend and girlfriend ever since first grade. And we fell in love thru the years. But unfortunately, as we entered junior high school and even high school we lost that romance and love interest in each other. |edit|

Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 03:19

What ever happened to the real coders out there??

Like many of us, they got girlfriends/married... And can only use the auld PC with permission from she-who-must-be-fed!


Intel Core i5 6400 2.7GHz, NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1070 (8GB), 8Gig DDR4 RAM, 256GB SSD, 1TB HDD, Windows 10 64bit
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 03:34
power mousey

heya Dabz

that sums it up pretty well too.
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 07:53
I been with too many women. I've been unlucky with them.

I've been cheated on left-right-and centre, the ones that turned out to be drinkers and control freaks, have beaten the crap out of me.

I've had a few that have accused me of cheating, only to find out that they had cheated on me all along.

I've had them smash my car up when they dont get their own way.

I had one-sided relationships, such as the type when they go out clubbing, and flirting with other men. But when I want to go out to visit freinds, she goes f**king ape-sh*t.

I could go on, but it will only make me depressed, but one thing that I noticed... They all say at the beginning of the relationship... "I will never do any of that stuff to you". Well !... They always do all of the above, and ten-fold.

When the nickname "Bird" was thought of for a woman/girl, it was one of the most applicable names that they could be given. What I'm saying is this... "A man is kind of like a tree", "Birds sit one them, and then they sh*t on them".

If you want my advice... Stay single .
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 08:15
power mousey

yeah Steve, I can relate.

Lets talk about this with a few barrels
of Moosehead.
Or do you prefer Zima?
I like both so it doesn't matter to me.
See ya at the Big Bear Pub in Glasglow, Scotland.

all cheers! raises mug.
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 08:39
Moosehead !... I've heard of that somewhere before. Is it a brand of ale ?.
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 08:46
power mousey

The MooseHead dude.

Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 08:52
Oh, its lager. I like the more natually brewed stuff. Bitter and Ale. I find lager a bit too gassy.

Newcastle Brown Ale is a good tasting drink, if it is sold over where you are. It very easy to drink too much of it though, because of how good it tastes.

LOL, I think that we are going off topic again .
Sun, 28 Oct 2007, 11:52

Newcastle Brown Ale

Good old Newkie broon... I like a drop of that too now and again!

I live about 13 miles from Newcastle, so its obvious I have a taste for it!

Though being a Sunderland fan, I keep that quiet lol!


Intel Core i5 6400 2.7GHz, NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1070 (8GB), 8Gig DDR4 RAM, 256GB SSD, 1TB HDD, Windows 10 64bit